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How to Practice Radical Self-acceptance

How to Practice Radical Self-acceptance

How to Practice Radical Self-acceptance

Radical self-acceptance is something you need to practice if you tend to worry a lot, have a hard time accepting reality as it is, struggle with a certain type of insecurity, feel the need to be extra hard or put a lot of pressure on yourself . 

What is it?

Radical self-acceptance means going an extra mile with embracing who you are, without any conditions or exceptions to both your positive and negative attributes. It means trying to get rid of the but, ifs’ and what if’s in your life. It means truly accepting everything for what it is in the present moment.

The more you accept yourself and accept things for what they are, the more you’ll feel intune and in alignment with yourself.

Why you should practice self-acceptance

  • If you always have a duality within and your inner critic overtakes your life making it feel like it’s YOU against YOU all the time  then self-acceptance will be a healing path to a more wholesome life. This is because self-acceptance makes you surrender and accept yourself just as you are without needing to change anything.
Shannon ables

What self-accceptance does is open up more possibilities of succeeding because you aren’t fighting yourself along the way.

  • It is empowering because it means taking reality for what it is without pushing it in a different way. It means that you have taken the power away from your inner critic.

  • It decreases your suffering because normally we put ourselves down more than other people do and we say the harshest and meanest things to ourselves. Self-acceptance will help you let go of the shame and blame that you have put on yourself.

How

Detach – Keep an objective point of view and choose not to fight the feelings and instead let it be.

Noticing – Learn how to notice when you are not practicing self-acceptance. Catch yourself when you are overly fixated on your mistakes, flaws, frustrations and disappointments.

Empathize – Ask yourself what you’d do if someone else was going through the same and flip it around to yourself.

Practical Tools

Breathe work – Hold your breath for 5 seconds and with every breath out take it as a moment of surrender and acceptance to your current reality. It will calm you down and slow down all the rampant thoughts that are coming to you.

Mantras – Find a mantra that you can say whenever you experience resistance to self-acceptance.

The journey to Self-Acceptance

The more you accept yourself and accept things for what they are, the more you’ll feel intune and in alignment with yourself. You’ll experience less fear, anguish and  less anxiety and it will create a domino effect in your mental and emotional well being.

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Being an introvert during COVID-19

Being an introvert during COVID-19

Introversion is a personality trait characterized by getting stimulation from internal sources as opposed to external ones. An introvert recharges from time spent alone. As introverts we are so accustomed to being within and with ourselves and social distance to some extent is the preferable choice. Social distancing is part of our norm and the only difference this time round is that it is forced. 

Our society is built on extroverts, right from school with group assignments to the workplace with meetings and working as a team. Growing up you are taught to glorify extroversion and adapt to fit into the extrovert world.  As an introvert you are always left feeling lesser than and it forces you to change who you are.

Several meme’s have been making rounds and my favorite has to be that “Introverts it is our time”. With social distancing and quarantine in place we are now able to be our true self and accept ourselves for who we are and not need to change ourselves and our basic personality. Here are a few perks of quarantine

    • Learning and Work meetings are majorly on online platforms.
    • You don’t have to feel guilty for turning down or cancelling plans.
    • We get to slow slow down and form deeper connections with the people in our lives.
    • Less Social exhaustion – Introverts experience social exhaustion especially from people who are socially draining.
    • Creativity – Since we are in our natural state our creativity has been heightened and we are able to come up with brilliant ideas.

With that said, we still want the pandemic to end because of all the havoc that it has caused and as much as we like it now, introvert or extrovert we are all  social beings.

Are you an Information Addict?

Are you an Information Addict?

A study by the University of California , Haas School of Business found out that information acts on the brain’s dopamine producing a reward system in the same way as money, food or drugs. Our brains can over value information that makes us feel good even though it is not useful.

We are living in a time where information has never been more accessible. It’s all good and well having all that information but we can fall into a trap and become information addicts. If you are an information addict you want to soak up all that information and are always on the hunt for what you can learn next. The problem with that is that you keep learning and never start doing and as time passes you end up knowing a lot of things but you haven’t done anything much.  

There is a difference between seeking out knowledge to just know something and seeking knowledge with a purpose to apply it. If you know something and you are not doing anything with it then serves no purpose. When seeking out information always try to ask yourself why you are doing it. Is it to just know facts or is it to be implemented elsewhere.

7 tips to manage your time better

7 tips to manage your time better

We can all agree that time is a limited resource and that is why it’s important that we learn how to manage it. If you are reading this, you are probably not making good use of your time and you want to learn whether you can do something about it. Below are 7 tips that will help you manage your time in a better way.
    • Before you learn how to manage your time better, you first have to understand how you manage your time as of now,  so that you can know exactly where you are going wrong. In order to track your time daily so as to figure out where your time goes.
    • Every minute spent in planning saves you 10 minutes in execution. It is therefore important to plan your days ahead of time e.g. the night before or before the start of your day.
    • To do lists are a powerful tool if used correctly. Use the rule of three by writing down three things you want to accomplish during the week, followed by three things you want to accomplish during the day.
    • Set priorities on your list so that you can know what to tackle first and how much time to allocate to each task. Use the 80/20 rule to guide you i.e. if you have ten things on your list, 2 will be more valuable than the other 8.
    • Use the single handling technique by beginning with the most important task and staying with it to its completion.
    • If your mind is trying to remember all the things you need to do, you will have a hard time focusing and you will end up forgetting to do things or taking longer to complete tasks. To curb that just brain dump so that you can free up your mind and give yourself a chance to concentrate on the tasks at hand.
    • Incorporate batch which basically means consolidating tasks to save time and avoid constant task switching. 
In conclusion, you don’t have to incorporate all the tips at once. You just have to work through trial and error to find the mix that works for you.
Why & How to Enjoy being Alone

Why & How to Enjoy being Alone

Why & How to Enjoy being Alone

“Sometimes, you need to be alone. Not to be lonely, but to enjoy your free time being yourself.”

Do you enjoy being alone? Naturally we are wired to want to belong to a community and that is why at times we struggle with being alone. You are the only person that will be with you for your entire life and that is why it is important to build intimacy with yourself. It is in the tranquility of the quiet where we get to know ourselves. The ultimate goal is to learn how to be happy alone as you are happy with others.

Why

  • Once you learn how to be alone, it leads to stronger relationships because you are able to understand yourself and in turn you will be able to understand other people. It is also in those times when you’ll value the time you spend with others highly.
  • It gives you a sense of  peace because you are no longer afraid to lose people. You learn that you do not need another person to be complete.
  • It is when you are alone that you stop thinking and start feeling. The feelings that have been shoved deep down start to resurface. Being alone  helps you get in touch with your emotions and gives you the ability to emotionally support yourself.
  • It helps you understand your emotions better because a lot of times we attach and download our issues onto other people but these are just a fraction of the emotions. Being alone helps you come into terms with these emotions.
  • It helps you understand your true nature outside of the factors that affect you. When you are on your own you don’t have to put on a persona or an allusion of who you are in front of other people. There are no expectations, you are just you.
  • It gives you time to remember and reconnect with the things that make you happy. When you are alone it gives you the opportunity to choose, and you will realize that you will choose the things that bring you joy.
  • It clears your mind by giving your mind space to clear mental chatter and tune into our inner voice.
  • It gives you a sense of independence by giving you the confidence to make decisions on your own.

How

  • Spend your time on activities that bring you joy like cooking, writing, dancing, baking, painting
  • Follow your curiosity to learn more about yourself.
  • Take that time to explore the world through your eyes and through your mind. Take it as a time to get deeply connect with yourself.
5 Ways to a More  Productive Life

5 Ways to a More Productive Life

Productivity is not about doing more, it’s about making more use of your time. Below are a few tips that will help you be more productive.

Urgent vs Important (Eisenhower Matrix)

Most of the time we prioritize the urgent things as opposed to the important ones. When deciding on what to do first, focus on the things that have a higher positive effect in your life. Another tip is to look at the outcome as opposed to the time that it will take to complete a particular task.

Re-think your to do list

When writing down your to do list use a futuristic approach. What task will give you the most satisfaction at the end of the day if completed. Once you identify it prioritize it as the most important one and use the same approach when assigning priority to the rest of your tasks.

Planner vs Doer

We all have a reflective and action taking side and it’s important to create a balance with both sides. Reflective activities include reflecting on your life, setting goals and dreaming about all the things you want to achieve. Doer activities on the other hand include putting your goals and dreams into action. Curve out time to plan and organize things so that the same energy can trickle down to the implementation of your goals and ideas.

Avoid Context switching

This means switching from one task to another.  It leads to loss of effectiveness because our brains take time to re-calibrate and mentally prepare to do another task. Take advantage of batching similar things or tasks that take a short amount of time to complete together. This will help you avoid the temptation of switching between tasks.

Change the way you spend your breaks

When taking a break in between work try to engage in things that are outside of work or conversations that are all about work so that you can feel more reinvigorated when you get back to work.